Babies make us marinate in life. You are forced to dip below the surface, stop the crazy pace you were on before, take one step at a time and really get involved.
Its feels as though time has changed forever, stepping into Motherhood feels as though the time line of life has warped, its now unrecognizable but, in all the madness, sleep derivation and new 'rules', I love it. I feel like I am trying to do a million things at once, and I'm crazily looking for more, I'm sleep deprived, confused, tired and so deeply in love. The most indescribable emotional time in my life. Period.
I was once told that having one baby you don't change a lot in your life and the way you live, but having more than one you'll have to change the complete structure. My life has changed almost completely already with just the one baby, and in the short time she has been in my life. My daily routine is so vastly different to that of the working and 'solo' person I used to me. No more late nights because I feel like it. No more 'one too many' drinks just because I feel like it. No more spending as long as I like getting dressed for work, coffee dates or dinner and drinks. No more quick dashing to the shops. No more just grabbing my wallet and keys and heading out. So many things have changed, Ive added a new side to my personality, a mum.
Its a right smack in the face, I was so unprepared, even though I thought I was very prepared. I bought and read oodles of books, talked to friends and family and even strangers (pregnancy can make anyone your friend), spent hours online reading articles, websites, forums and such. Went to prenatal classes, pregnancy yoga, baby shops and more. But somehow absolutely none of this even slightly prepared me for what its really like. I found a lot is sugar coated, skipped over or its assumed you already know somehow. I wish, I really do, that at least someone would have sat me down and told me the harsh no-holds reality of what I was about to do. Not the birth, obviously there's plenty on that out there and even more people to tell gory stories about it too. But what I really needed was someone to tell me how they felt, the emotions, the pain, the life changes, the huge and unrealistic demands a new baby has on everything. Motherhood should not be shunned away and only spoken about in either a fairytale like manner or horror story — wheres the reality story?!
I know every experience is different, we are all individuals, but seriously, all the new mums I have spoken to feel the same. You are made to feel as though you must smile on the outside and tell everyone its going so well, when inside you are beyond stress, confused, tired and wondering what the hell you have done! Babies are like spring. They are so amazing, gorgeous, new, precious and sweet (even when crying, the cute little things) but they are also so much more than this and mums need to talk realistically with each other and friends. Friends who haven't have babies yet need to have real information about what its really like.
The more information you have, the more you can prepare yourself. Instead of spending the first few months in a complete 'am I dreaming or am I awake', 'I'm so tired I could just sleep forever', 'what am I doing wrong' type of situation, you can at least take comfort knowing its normal, it happens and there are solutions to a lot of the problems babies bring on.